Writing this a half an hour too late to actually fall on day seventeen, but I had the thought and feeling of gratitude starting a few hours ago so...I'm saying it still counts. Day seventeen of the gratitude project and I am grateful for, well, a couple of things. I am grateful for my mom for being my date when I would have otherwise been alone, I'm grateful for the waiter who was kind enough to bring this non-drinker a "happy hour sized" margarita, despite it's inherent dangers for the basically dry human that is me (and one that still cannot taste tequila, thanks Covid), and I'm grateful for the plan I'd originally had more or less going completely south, which gave me the opportunity to have a fun night out with mom, and the opportunity to drink a margarita out of a fishbowl.
Originally, I was pretty bummed about the whole thing, I won't lie. Nothing was going according to the plan. However, as life often does, that proved itself to be not only just fine, but better than expected. So, to add to the list, I'm grateful to the life lesson that, when no one offers you a chair, bring your own table, and even if the people you had hoped to fill it don't show up, sit proudly at it anyway, and next time, invite your ride or dies. It took until almost thirty two years old to finally come to terms with the fact that changing who you are for the approval of others never actually works, and the best route you can possibly take is one of complete authenticity. Let your freak flag fly, because it will attract others like you, those who love you just as you are. And who knows, it may even help them feel safe enough to live in their authenticity as well. Life is too short not to surround yourself with real friends, and one of the most important lessons a people pleaser like me can learn is...not everyone is going to like you, and that's okay. You will be too much for some people, and realistically if you're not, you probably aren't living life to the fullest. So go out, hold down the table, drink the giant marg, and live your best life, because as far as this version of you knows...you only get the one.
Don't let your head talk your soul out of it. Just do it.
-Dominique
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